Theme words - Goal Setting

The orange belt theme word was Goal Setting. By sheer coincidence, this also coincides with the time when people are supposed to be committing to the Black Belt Club.

I'm all for setting goals and trying to accomplish them. The dojang had an interesting way of setting the goal to become a black belt. Master Lee gave us these "black belts" with an orange stripe down the middle. In reality, we were orange belts. However, throughout the dojang, we were supposed to be treated like we were black belts. This includes people bowing to us. At first, people saw the belts and we did get the bow treatment. It was a little disconcerting. I think this is part of my American cultural bias. However, I believe that word spread through the dojang and people caught on. It died off after a while.

We were also supposed to act like black belts with our attitude and how we treated others....including an "indomitable spirit". I made sure that both me and my kids were doing everything as properly as we could. I would harass my oldest into being more assertive. My youngest into focusing more. Myself into trying to remember all the techniques and steps.

He also addressed us parents and told us that if we were to ever see our kids not acting like black belts, to report them and he would take the special belt away and replace it with a normal orange belt. I used this threat several times on my kids when they would start acting up and it generally got them in line. Did I ever follow through with the threat? No. Should I have? Maybe.

I explained all this to my TKD buddy at work. He gave me the raised eyebrow look. I think he was offended that I would be wearing anything that remotely resembled a black belt. I can understand that completely. A black belt is not to be taken lightly. I convinced myself that the big orange stripe down the middle of it really meant it wasn't real.

Theme words - Enthusiasm

The yellow belt theme word is enthusiasm. The motivational poster on the wall defined it as "Sharing your excitement with others." Examples they gave were about actively participating in class, kihaping (yelling) loudly, and arriving 5 minutes early to class among others. The cynic in me leads me to think that the unspoken example is "tell your friends about how much you love taekwondo so they'll sign up with us." The best and final example they actually gave in class: "Do your best in everything you do." We try to teach this to our kids in almost every situation. We don't care how well they do, we just want them to give it their best effort.

My daughters have opposite personalities. My oldest is pretty reserved and quiet while my youngest shows no restraint in her emotions, both up and down. For the longest time in the classes, I would listen for my oldest daughter's kihap when she was kicking and I could tell that she wasn't even opening her mouth. Usually, she was in line right next to me as we were practicing. A simple "hand behind my ear, I can't hear you" would get her to at least say it. The instructors picked up on it and started calling out individual people to be the only ones kihaping. My daughter is actually pretty loud when she wants to be and everyone could hear her when it was her turn.

The best and final example they actually gave in class: "Do your best in everything you do." We try to teach this to our kids in almost every situation. We don't care how well they do, we just want them to try to do their best. While my daughter was a yellow belt, we ran into a situation where it was obvious she was just doing partial effort. I won't reveal details as they aren't important. As discipline though, I had her look up the definition of enthusiasm. I found one that matched the "doing your best" example and had her write it 25 times. I then had a discussion with her on what I was trying to teach her. Part of that discussion involved a warning to her that if I saw her giving partial efforts, I would talk to Master Lee about it. A very likely consequence is a demotion, even if it is in situations not directly involving taekwondo like school work or chores.

The immediate result was an increase in the level of "enthusiasm". It has carried forward to this day but every once in a while, I do have to remind both of my kids about doing their best. A gentle reminder about having a "black belt attitude" is enough to get the point across.

Theme words - Focus

At my dojang, each of the belts has a theme word or phrase attached to it. The main hallway has a string of posters (yeah...kinda like those motivational posters in some corporate environments), one for each theme word. The three themes my daughters and I have done so far: White - Focus, Yellow - Enthusiasm, Orange - Goal Setting.

The dojang defines Focus as "concentrating with your mind, eyes and body". This means not only thinking about what you are doing but looking at it and not doing anything else like fidgeting. When I was a child, I was high energy and always fidgeting, messing with myself, or looking around at who knows what. Friends, family, and strangers would all comment on it. I've noticed this has carried over to my youngest. After 5 months of taekwondo, I've noticed a change in her that she actually pays attention more in class. She sits up straight with her hands on her knees and is really paying attention when the instructor is teaching. She also doesn't mess around so much when she is doing whatever activity (kicks, punches, escrima, etc) we are assigned to do.

Now if only this would carry over to the dinner table. She has a tendency to fall out of her chair because she can't sit still.